36. As Dianne likes to put it, our daily
schedule is like New England weather. Wait 5 minutes and it’ll change.
37. We found that clean is very
subjective when it comes to clothes. Dianne maintains a higher level than me
but I’ve been known to let sweaty shirts dry and then wear to work again the
next day if they pass the smell test. (OK, kinda pass)
38. You know that Salvadoran people are
short? HOW SHORT ARE THEY???????? I can have 4 of our friends in the backseat,
look in my rearview mirror and I don’t even see the tops of their heads J
39. If a Salvadoran friend asks for a
quick ride someplace, don’t believe for one second it will be quick. I’ve yet
to leave our community with one person and not returned with at least 2 or 3
more. There’s always a side trip or someone we know someplace.
40. At the check points the police may be
armed to the teeth but if you give your U.S. License, your international
license, your vehicle identification card and your Salvadoran Identification
Card you’re good to go. Very important… when they say “porta arma” (do you have
a gun) say no.
41. So I’m picking dried corn off the
stalks for processing and one of the guys says, ‘get rid of the gloves it makes
it too hard’. I toss my gloves and he’s right, it’s easier picking now. Then 5 minutes
later he says, watch out for Alacrans (scorpions), you’re going to see a lot of
them on the corn. WHAT THE $@#^&%, that’s why I was wearing gloves!!!!! He
wasn’t kidding either but Demos gracias adios I didn’t get stung.
42. On our divided highways you can
actually do a U-Turn into the other side of the highway. Of course you must
pull into the right breakdown lane in order to swing into the opening in the highway
dividers that, if you’re lucky, is wider than your car. You’re only crossing 3
lanes of speeding traffic but we’re living proof it can be done safely.
43. Salvadorans eat Pupusas for breakfast
(one of the reasons I love this place), they eat them for supper too (another
reason, I’m lovin it)but they’re hard to find for lunch. I’m told it’s just not
done.
44. My gas attendant yesterday was
wearing an Uzi, just saying.
45.
When
going to work in the fields, you bring your cell phone in case of emergencies.
If I drove to work I have my wallet too. Before you leave the house everything
goes in plastic sandwich bags before they go in your pocket. One, it might rain and we keep working and
two, you sweat through everything and you don’t want to kill your cellphone and
I hate a soggy wallet.
46. At
the end of rainy season fields of tiny morning glories appear and they cover
everything and it’s beautiful to see but to the people here they’re just monte
(weeds).
47. We’re
starting to eat street food and our preference is Pupusas (of course). If you
want to be safe skip the curtido. It’s coleslaw that you don’t know what water
it was washed with and unless you see the salsa cooking skip that too. We
haven’t had a problem.
48. Oh,
my trick of curing the Salsa /curtido bad water problem. When I bring them home
I bring the salsa to a boil before eating and the curtido I add a little water
to and bring it to a good steam.
49. Another
favorite street food is fried chicken, I swear they have the process down pat,
I haven’t eaten bad fried chicken yet.
50. Speaking
of fried chicken you have some Major Players in this franchise battle down
here. Pollo Campero, Pollo Choice and good Old Kentucky Fried Chicken. Pollo
Choice is OK but it’s just not in the same league as the others and KFC just
isn’t doing the U.S. proud. Pollo Campero is the go to place when Dianne and I
want fried chicken. There’s one in Providence RI, East Boston and Chelsea, MA.
Take it from the Missionary Gordito’s, you need to go get some right now.(See
#54)
51. Sick
of Chicken talk, I’m not. Until I came to El Salvador I have never seen Chicken
fast food restaurants this big. One side is like a huge children’s indoor
playground and the other serves food either sit-down or take out. Both KFC and Pollo Campero have these Chicken
eating children playing wonderlands.
52. Here’s
the scene OK, you’re in bumper to bumper traffic. You see someone with their
blinker on and they want to change lanes. Sometimes I let them in; sometimes I
don’t. It depends on how PO’ed I am. Don’t let the title Missionary fool you, I
get PO’ed. Now then, if the blinker goes
on and the driver rolls his window down and starts pointing to where he’s
going, you better let him in, he’s coming. I’ve done it, it works. I love
driving down here.
53. Sitting
on our porch just zoning out, just soaking up the view, and Dianne asks “can chickens
walk without bobbing their heads????” I
look and I kid you not, they walk and bob their heads, walk and bob, walk and
bob. Maybe we’ve been here to long maybe not but we’ve been watching these guys
for over a year and sometimes these little things pop into your head. Note to
self, Dianne is watching the chickens too closely.
54. We’ve
found some great cheese puff snacks called Gorditos. Allow me to explain
“Gordito” loosely defined is “cute little fatty”. Being a cute little fatty, do
they have to remind us what we’re doing to ourselves as we eat? Again, I kid
you not “Gorditos”
55. So
I’m getting some diesel fuel at the Gasolinera and the pump stops, I assume
it’s full. The gas attendant says poco mas (a little more), I say va pues
(sure). Well he proceeds to top this off like I’ve never seen, he pumps diesel
then starts rocking the car like he’s tipping a cow. He does this over and over
till he’s put in a full gallon + more. Dianne was in the car and thought she
was in a roller coaster.
56. Our
winning streak against scorpions went by the boards, one of the bastards got
me, yup I said bastard it hurt that much. (Missionary is a title that carries
way too many holier than thou connotations). The scorpion actually had crawled
all the way up my pant leg and got me on my, wait for it…………. Upper inside
thigh, to close for comfort if you know what I mean. Beejeezus did it hurt,
felt like I got stuck by a hot poker.
BUT, I took one Benadryl 2 tylenol and woke up the next day no problem.
57.
I’ve
become accustomed to seeing difficult situation/things here and I don’t really
react besides the needed prayer. But I can’t help but smile when I see a girl in
her young to midteens holding her Mother or Grandmothers hand at a store
walking along talking, laughing and smiling. BFF’s do this also at all ages and
it’s just so “nice”.
58. Here’s
one of our inside sarcastic jokes. (Yes, missionaries are sarcastic)When
something that we thought was going to be quick and easy goes to heck in a hand
basket and we’re now waiting endlessly for something to go right. We will look
at each other and say sarcastically “well, what else would we be doing”.
59.
If
you want to cause a ruckus in church down here, suggest singing an offertory
hymn as the ending hymn and you’ll be looked at like you’ve lost your mind.
Suggest singing any song out of the normal category and you’ll get that look.
Who says change is hard in El Salvador?
60. The
elevation of San Salvador is so much higher than El Maizal, that when we drive
there, our ears pop going and coming back.
61. Our
neighbor’s dogs had a cough; it went on for a few days. They finally made them
a home remedy. They made necklaces out of slightly burnt corn cobs and tied
them around the dog’s necks. I asked if it was done for humans too. My
neighbors said no and look at me like I was wacky. Stop me if I’m wrong but I thought burnt corn
cob necklaces on dogs was kinda wacky.
62. Seeing
people out on a family bike ride is common here BUT, they’re all on one bike.
We’ve seen 5 people on a bike. Dad driving with a child on the cross bar, Mom
holding a baby behind him and then a child standing on pegs in the back. I bet
that’s not what you envisioned when you started reading this.
63. Motorcycles
are a very popular mode of transportation here but not street bikes. All the Bikes are mostly 100’s or 125’s. They
have to be the most dangerous modes of transportation I’ve ever witnessed and
quite frankly it’s the driver’s fault. In heavy (not stopped) traffic they will
ride in between lanes, in breakdown lanes and basically weave anyway they want
to get ahead. It’s not real conducive for safety when drivers are trying to
pass or force their ways into other lanes. I’ve seen at least 5 motorcycle
accidents and I’m pretty sure 2 were fatalities. I will never drive or ride on
a motorcycle here.
64. Does
anyone have a good iguana recipe they want to share???? I see them sold in the
road occasionally but not sure what to do with them.
65.We
saw a Gecko run up one of our walls with ½ a tail. We felt bad for a second
till we thought, OMG, whatever grabbed his tail is in our house!!!!!!!!!!!
66.Too
much information alert. We’re adults right??? Well guys pull over down here to
pee along the side of the road, no biggee right? Well, they don’t step into the
woods. There they are, right there feet from the road pee’ing. COME
ON!!!!!!!!!!!
67. Dinner
on an open porch looking over the Pacific with a wonderful sunset view. I had
the calamari and shrimp rice mix, Dianne had the grilled large shrimp. They
come with rice, salad and tortillas. We also had a few cervezas. The bill
including a generous propina (tip) was $30.00
68. Joya
Ceren is a local Mayan ruin we’ve visited. It’s their smaller version of Pompeii.
Buried in volcanic ash, dust and lava. All interesting stuff but a side note is
that the place was full of Torogoz (National Bird of El Salvador). The Torogoz
build their nests in the soft ground of cliff faces or steep riverbanks. The
way the ruins have been excavated many nesting places have been created.
69.In
the U.S. as soon as any little boy can grasp something with his hand, we hand
them a baseball or ball of some sort to throw. Down here, as soon as they can
walk, they start kicking a ball. I like the nuanced differences.
70. Sometimes
it gets a little challenging wondering if we are accomplishing anything. But, I
just read a great quote from a Priest discussing Churches embracing the
principals of the business world to produce more success in ministry. He
reminds us that “We’re called to be faithful, not successful”.
Demos gracias a Dios
And as our mutual friend Varian once reassured me, when we had a low retreat turnout: "Jesus told us to feed His sheep, not count them." One of the most difficult things for Norte Americanos to learn is the importance of BEING, rather than DOING. You are BEING the hands and feet and heart of Christ as you walk with the people of El Maizal.
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